You must be wondering from where our Big B is back???  Actually what I am talking about is, his return on the small screen. Big B is back with a bang yani ki, KAUN BANEGA COROREPATI-IV ?. And this time on Sony Entertainment Television. After testing the caliber of Shahrukh Khan, the makers once again zeroed down on the millennium star.
Saw the promo just few minutes back. Though Amitabh’s face has not been shown on the camera. But is it really hard for we people to identify Mr. Bachchan?
“Mr Bachchan was our last and final choice for the host,” Ajit Thakur, Business Head of Sony Entertainment Television told a press conference
The show is likely to be aired in October-November. Auditions for the show will start from the first week of August.

Aaj hum aapko sikhayenge ki aap kaise bana sakte hain ek aisa TV Serial jisme ho-“Reality”, “Drama” aur saath hi itna swaad jo channel ki TRP rating ko aasman ki sair kara sake.

Iske liye jin ingredients ki hame zaroorat hai wo hain:

1)  8 se 10 aise celebrities jinka kabhi na kabhi vivadon se vaasta raha ho. Agar nahi, to aise celebrities bhi challenge jo fizool ka vivaad paida karne me sankoch na karen.

Waise agar aapko Rakhi Sawant ki dates mil jaayen to wo akeli hi kaafi hai,(“Rakhi Ka Swayamvar-Season2”).

2)  Male ke saath saath female ratio ka bhi khaas khayaal rakhen… Jitni zayada females, utne kam kapde, aur utne hi zayada darshak(Viewers). Aap chahen to bathroom ki jagah, open area me artificial bhi laga sakte hain… Aisa karen se female celebrities bikini me aakar wahan nahayengi jo show ke liye laal mirch ke tadke ka kaam karega.(“Is Jungle Se Mujhe Bachaao”)…

3)  Show me jagah jagah par beep ki aawaz daalna na bhoolen. Aisa karen ke liye un celebrities ka istemaal karen- Gaaliyan jinke finger tips pe reheti hon aur gussa naak par. Ek episode me normally ek jhagada(fight) aur usme lagbhag 8-10 baar beep ki aawaz daalna show me jaan daal deta hai.

4)  Apne serial me emotions ka chonk daalne ke liye celebrities ko rulaayen… Namkeen aansuon(tears) ka istmaal swaad anusaar karen… Iske liye sabse appropriate celebrities ho sakte hain- Monika Bedi, Gohar Khan, Shweta Tiwari, Raja etc…

5)  Celebrities ko gande gande task dekar jaise ki earthworms ka noodle khana(“Is Jungle Se Mujhe Bachaao”), aap apne show ki khushboo badha sakte hain, aisa karne se darshak(Viewers) aapke show ka besabri se intzaar karenge…

6)  Khana jitni zayaada der tak gas par pakta hai utna hi zayaad tasty hota hai… Agar aapko apne TV show ke episodes thode kam lag rahe hon to uski avadhi badhane ki koshish karen. Iske liye aap Wild Card Entry jaise masaalon ko upyog kar sakte hain…

Yun toh show ka swaad TRP badhane ke bahut se tareeke hai… Par sab se useful tareeka hai (Jo aaloo ki tarah kisi bhi sabzi me dal jata hai), logon ko aapas me ladwana (Fighting between celebrities).

Ye sab masale aapke show ko chat-pata banana ke liye kaafi hain.  Inki help se aap ek superhit TV Reality Show bana sakte hain.

The secret is out… Elesh from Canada is the dulha for our Rakhi…

Rakhi Sawant, a controversial figure in our hindi film industry…

Cameras love her more than anybody else!

Controversies run behind her… She does not need to put an extra effort to create any sensation! Her presence is enough to set the ambience on fire…She has a magnetic quality that pulls the TV cameras towards her automatically…

The TRP of news channels, touch the sky, when Rakhi becomes news for them.

Reality shows become more spicy, with Rakhee in them!!!

No matter how irritating she might appear to a section of society, the Truth is- Nobody has missed “Rakhi Ka Swayamvar”, (If not the complete show then there curiosities must have forced them to watch “Rakhi Ki Shaadi” in bits and pieces…)

But the question is, Is the show for Real? Are the contestants for Real? Are they really in love with Rakhi or vice-versa? Do they really want to marry her? Or it is just a stunt to get noticed?

What I think is that most of the contestants had their selfish motives, (of becoming famous), and the Swayamvar was only a SWAYAM-WAR for them… Manmohan Tiwari was one Jisse Rakhi ne kiya benakaab…

Infact one of the 3 finalists Chittiz also told Rakhi that he takes her as a good friend and is not in love with her YET, (When the show had reached its finale)… Then why did he come on the show?

The uneasiness of the mothers was also visible clearly during the show. Their fake smiles, screamed out loud, what their hearts really wanted…, “Hey Bhagwan, Rakhi Sawant aur meri bahu, Nahi Nahi Nahi!!!”

And on the last day, the happiness of the two families, whom Rakhi did not select, was more prominent then the Parujanwala’s… That’s what I feel!!!

Well, I hope to be wrong and wish Rakhie and Elesh a very happy and a looooong married life…

One more thing I want to say is that Rakhi Sawant could have dressed a bit more decently on the occasion, like a true Indian bride…

After a wide research of Indian Reality shows, a U.S. based channel has come up with 5 qualities in a person,to be a reality show judge… Though these 5 points have been kept under wraps and are marked highly confidential, but our sources, some how, managed to steal them and here are they….

1. The first and the foremost- Never be in concise with your co- judges.. The more you fight with the co- judges, the more the TRP will increase and the more will be the chances of you to get reapeted as a judge…

Example- Anu Malik! An “Indian Idol” judge from past four seasons and now a judge for “Entertainment Ke Liye Kuch Bhi Karega”, on the same channel…

2. Always come up with a new idea for appreciating a contestant… Remember this new way of appreciation will be wholely and solely yours, and no other judge can use it, without your permission…

Example- (a) Whistle, (the louder, the more popular..)

(b) Teen Tali, (I personally did not like this concept of teen tali, don kno why Karishma Kapoor chose it?..)

(c) Jhappi, (I think Vaibhavi Merchant stole this jhappi idea from Munna Bhai..)

(d) Guldasta, (not a bouqet of flowers but a bouqet of marks, though it will be counted as 10 numbers only, but it will give your contestant a feeling of self satisfaction…)

You can also get the copywrite of some special words or phrases and repeat them after every performance, you have liked…

Example- “Jai Mata Di, lets Rock” or “Jhintukle Mintukle Tigh Tigh Tigh Tigh Tigh”… The more absurd the phase will be the more contestants and the audiences would like to listen to them…

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3. Compel your audience to reach at the pinnacle of sorrow. And when everybody attains the catastrophe, ease the ambience by saying something which will bring you in the category of the most sensitive judge, especially for the contestant…

Example- Remember Himesh Reshmiya saying to a contestant, ” Mujhe tumhare ghar mei roti chahiye..”

4. Always criticise the audience for not voting for the deserving candidate… Quote yourself, “Mujhe janta ke iss faisle se bahut dukh hua..” ya phir just stand up from your seat and leave the set saying, “Mujhe lagta hai humare yahan hone ka koi matlab hi nahi hai..” Do not worry you can re-enter in the next episode…

I do not understand, if the judges are so much against the voting system then, why do they accept to be a judge in such a format???

And the last but not the least…

5. Self made shayaris can also help you to be a famous judge…

Example- “Tere gaane ne mujhe diya khumar bahut zyada.. tu zarur ayega top 5 mei yeh hai mera vaada…” (I know that was bad, but you can listen to even the worst in such shows, by whom?? hmmm…. Do I need to tell you??